The Answer May Surprise You


I am curious, do you know what it is that you really want? The answer may really surprise you. This is something my wife and I have kind of been digging in and learning over the last several weeks, and as we are breaking into 2019 now, it is something we are really focused on in our own life.

I think a lot of us focus in on the wrong thing. We don’t actually focus on what it is that we want, but we focus on what it is that we do not want. Many of us can very quickly say well I don’t want this or I don’t want that. But when you break it down and ask what is it that you do want, it’s like ah….I want this not to be the case, which is going back to what you don’t want.

As you think about 2019, where you’re going and what it is that you’re going to achieve, really put the thought into what it is that you want and leave the stuff that you don’t want alone. And here’s the reason why:

If you’ve ever read the Law of Attraction by Napoleon Hill or The Secret by Rhonda Byrnes, one of things that really comes out and I’ve been reflecting on and realizing how true it is, and psychology supports it through a theory call self-fulfilling prophecy, really says that whatever you focus your thoughts on, that’s going to end up happening. Unfortunately, that law doesn’t work with negation. If you say well I don’t want this, all it hears is the latter part, the this.

What you focus your mind on is more of what you’re going to get. Studies have shown that when you tell kids “don’t do this,” whatever this is will be exactly what they do. Why? It’s because that is the last thing their brain registered and what keeps playing over and over in their mind.

As adults, we’re the same way. When we say that I don’t want this, whether it’s bills, or stress, or traffic, or bitter coffee, or whatever, that is what our minds focus on. So inevitably, we bring it about because that is where our mental energy is going.

So as you get into 2019, just really take the time and think about it. I was with Kim, my wife, earlier today, and we had an interaction that I really didn’t care for. Normally in the past, we would go and I would say that I don’t want to keep doing this kind of interaction in the future. Rather than focusing on that, I paused and I said you know I’m really trying to choose my words carefully, and so here’s what I want. I then described for her what I want for our relationship, how we communicate, and how we work together in our business.

I found that to actually be really tough because it’s really easy when we experience something to go I don’t want that any more. But you have to reverse it, and you have to think about what it is that you do want, then really train your mind and your thoughts on what it is that you do want.

This is the key to the law of attraction. So challenge for you as you get into 2019 is that you train your mind to focus on what you do want, and ignore the things that you do not want.

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